2024 Election

Today the majority of American voters apparently chose a lying, cheating, bullying, pandering narcissistic sexual predator as their leader. Those of us who voted for the other realize that our fundamental rights as Americans, as human beings, will now be for sale to the highest bidder. We'll all see how this unfolds. I pray my worst fears go unrealized.

Oh Waiter!

Today I'm feeding my cat and I have a little less than half a can of one cat food flavor, let's call it 'Fisherman's Special'. It's not enough food for his dinner, so I open up another can, let's call this one 'Beefy Dinner with Gravy', mix it in with the other, set the bowl down and he goes to town. 

I start wondering as Gil is nom-nomming away if this pisses him off. Like, "What the hell, Ken? You mixed Fisherman's Special and Beefy Dinner with Gravy? That's fucked up and I'm not paying for this." 

He doesn't stop eating but now with every bite he's plotting his revenge.

Do Carpenter Bees Throw Shade at Cicadas Because They Can't Fly for Shit?

Next to my driveway is a utility pole that has for years housed a carpenter bee condominium. Though we know one another, we've not yet learned to communicate. 

We're working on it.

And they fascinate me. I stand there staring at them. I do this a lot.

This afternoon I'm standing there staring as a cicada rambles into view. Compared to the bees, it's the insect aeronautical equivalent of a big dumb dog. It almost collides with one of the bees, saved only by the bee's maneuverability.

 I hear this conversation.

Joe: "WTF was that‽ Stan, you saw it? It just flew right through my flight path, if you call that flying. Jeez!"

Stan: "Cicadas, Joe, they're called cicadas. How do you not know this? ...been asleep for two weeks? Are you deaf?"

Joe: "Huh?"

Stan: "The Noise?"

Joe: "...damn near took my head off. Oh! That's them?"

Stan: "Yeah. They've been underground for like 17 years. They started coming out last week. ...billions of them. For 4 weeks all they do is drink, fuck, and lay eggs."

Joe: "No shit?"

Stan: "I shit you not. Joe, how do you not know this? It's been in the news for 6 months."

Joe: "That's kinda why I'm here. I stopped getting the paper.  ...went off the grid about a year ago. ...pot farm in the western suburbs. I'm tired of that shit."

Joe divebombs to the bottom of the pole, Stan follows suit.

Joe: "They're kinda cool, like prehistoric, or alien."

Stan,:  "Yeah. But you're right. They can't fly for shit."

A Day in the Life

They call me Agent K (no they don't). I'm a licensed home inspector and this is today's story.

Long Story Short

Today it's dreary, gray, about 31°F. Yesterday, a decent amount of heavy, wet snow fell.

A little while ago (it's noon here), I performed a moisture intrusion inspection that turned out to be less about moisture intrusion and more about attic condensation, the likes of which I've never seen.

Short Story Long 

Entering the ranch style home, I'm taken to the kitchen where I'm shown black water dripping from the the head of a sliding door separating a new addition and the old house. The new addition has a cathedral ceiling and houses a lap pool.

Buckets, pails and at least one trash can are almost filled with the stuff. I do an infrared scan of the interior, seeing cold spots at can lights and wall/ceiling intersections. I take RH and temp levels; both are elevated. I set up and climb my ladder to the attic.

In there it's literally raining. Every time I bump a rafter, drops of water fall like when shaking a tree limb after a summer rain.

There's a standalone dehumidifier that's not working because the genius who set it up ran the gravity drain hose uphill. An industrial blower fan pushes around air so water-laden I can see it. The space is dark, dank and cave-like. 66° and 54% RH. Shining my headlamp around I spot an active plumbing stack termination, a couple flat-roof breathers and uninsulated ductwork. 

Puddles are everywhere. Mold is everywhere. Little rivulets of water stream down the old roof toward what was once the house's north exterior wall.

All this is tucked away between an old, shingle/flat roof combo and a new pitched roof extension. ...an attic over an attic, as it were.

Attic ventilation consists of intermittent soffit vents and a ridge vent that's more sponge than vent. In the addition there are two bathroom-style vent fans with exterior termination. 

I've a good idea what I'll report and, keelhauling a GC aside, what I'll recommend. 

I just wanted to share.

Thanks for reading.

Agent K

Firearms Thoughts

This has gotten so out of hand as to have become fodder for a Shakespearean tragedy. Sadly that comparison is what we now see so often every time some imbecile decides to end an argument with a bullet.

Dont misconstrue this rant. I am pro-firearm ownership. 

What I'm not for is a gun in every hand.

What I'm not for is the illegal sale of firearms. 

There are humans who should not have this privilege. Everyone knows this. 

It should be exceptionally difficult to legally purchase a firearm. At the very least, it should be ridiculously more arduous than buying liquor or cigarettes or getting a drivers license. It should take at least as much time and effort to buy a firearm as it takes to obtain say, a pilot's license. The current system is reprehensible in its lack of responsibility.

I'm thinking Code of Hammurabi. If one kills another with a firearm without provocation. You die by firing squad.

Simple. Easy to understand. 

It isn't the responsibility of firearms manufacturers to police who buys their products. That is stupid.

And, idiots spouting off about their 2nd amendment rights being stomped on probably have something to hide. CCL is so stupidly easy any moron can pass the test. (And, fuck you. If you disagree with any of this, you probably shouldn't be carrying.)

Stupid Human Pet Tricks

The reality is the ad nauseam atrocities that define middle-east and arab/jew conflicts are nothing more than a squabble that has gone on for thousands of years because a story was written about some imaginary magical asshole choosing his favorite pet.

That that evolved into the clusterfuck that defines the modern-day middle east, antisemitism and anti-arab idealogies is testament to the self-serving leaders of these cults long-utilizing the power of propagandized ignorance to kill innocent humans. That's just plain evil and it comes from both sides of the fence. Choose a side? Choose the lesser of two evils? Let god decide? Lol. You think either side is justified? I would love to hear that argument.

My Current State of Mind - 9 October, 2023

You murder one another for some dirt with imaginary lines drawn in it. You drop bombs on the innocent because their belief and yours in magical beings are different, or because of who your mother or father or sister or brother are, or because of where your family is from, or for trinkets, or for what happened hundreds or thousands of years ago. You rape and murder women because you're incapable of self control or rational thought.

In the grand scheme, petty resentment means nothing, but it nonetheless is the engine that will destroy humanity and drive the destruction of our world. Those that condone and participate in these atrocities are destined to live through them, if you're that unfortunate.

The Wild Wild NAS

Note: I wrote this in 2016.

Our company recently purchased a quadcopter UAV, a really cool drone with a killer, gimbal-mounted, high-res multifunction camera capable of video and still photography. Its intended use is to provide us a means of inspecting inaccessible roofs. As I write, our drone is sitting on a workbench at the manufacturer's repair facility, out California way while back in Chicago, its operator (me) awaits a damage assessment/repair bill. It's FUBAR. I know it. I scraped it off the ground.

And I am not alone.  As of January, almost 300,000 recreational drones have registered with the FAA. Expect this number to go sky high come summer, as the FAA should make Part 107 the new law on the block. Currently, an operator of a drone for profit is required by law to possess a pilot's license. ...a real, bonifide pilot's license. Part 107 will likely do away with this.  I recently attended a Meetup panel presentation Titled "Is the Sky the Limit?" There, Mark Foisy, the Aviation Safety Inspector/Unmanned Aircraft Specialist for the Federal Aviation Agency alluded to as much.

As said, this will likely cause the number of drones and drone operators to skyrocket. To say the drone industry is a magnet to dreamers, schemers and snake oil salespeople is an understatement. With the tech built into today's consumer UAVs, practically anyone who's ever picked up a game controller can fly a drone. It's a no-brainer. Hell, I flew ours mere hours after acquiring it. And I take RTFM very seriously. So it is absolutely imperative that operators are held to high standards of safety, responsibility and oversight.

Think about this. The operator of a 15 pound drone has a flyaway  (a loss of operator control). The UAV crashes, resulting in vehicle accidents, property damage, personal injury or other mayhem. And with their proliferation and likely ubiquity, the potential for such scenarios increase.

So what is a fledgling drone operator to do? Moreover, what will the regulatory outcome be? Regarding the latter, the FAA has the final say, and they're still trying to figure it out. The rules will invariably be tweaked, again.

As for me, my plan is to operate responsibly, within the current regulations. In anticipation of Part 107, I'm planning on taking flight school (ground school) courses to become familiarized with the the terminology and NAS rules and regs. Ignorance has no place in the wild, wild NAS.

Luck

Yesterday I went grocery shopping. When I shop I use wireless Bluetooth headphones. At the checkout line, I take them out and put them in my pocket. After walking out of the store with my cart I reach into my pocket to retrieve the buds to put them back in their case only to discover one is missing. Also I discover a hole in said pocket. I look for them to no avail. Anyway, fast forward to this morning I call the grocery store and ask if they could look for it in lost and found. It wasn't there. I asked if I could come back to look one more time. They said sure. So I put on the same jacket and as I'm walking out to the truck I reach into the jacket pocket below the holy pocket and find the second earbud. It fell into another pocket.

Buying a Home Is Emotional

For most of us, buying a home is a big deal. It's likely the largest purchase we ever make and for many it's a rollercoaster. According to a recent survey I found on the internet, more than 65% of Gen Z buyers and 61% of millennials report crying at least once during their home-buying journey.

It doesn't matter if it's your first, second, or third home. It doesn't matter if you're single, raising a family or thinking about doing so. Your purchase or lack thereof will affect lives. 

A house is a dwelling; a place of residence, no more, no less.

 A home is different. A home is where you raise your kids, celebrate life events, entertain family and friends, live, love, sleep, work and play. A home is a refuge from the world. … even more relevant these past few years.

 

Knowing what you're getting into while looking to buy a home, and having a basic understanding of its systems is core to making wise, informed choices. 

A home inspection provides knowledge.

An inspector gathers information about the dwelling and its systems. Mostly, inspectors look for defects.

You get a report. 

But a great home inspection does that and more. A great home inspector provides insight to help make a better home.

This is where we come in. 

This is what we do.

 

CBI inspectors not only identify and report the broken stuff, we're mindful about how it all works together, or not. 

We live and breathe this stuff. We do this every day and in Chicagoland, we see it all. ...everything from Architectural Digest alumni, century-old mansions, new-construction and old single family houses, multi-unit apartment buildings, high-rise condos, townhomes, 3 flats, 2 flats (I've inspected parking spaces. Yeah.

We also temporarily take all of the liability off your shoulders (and hopefully some of the stress and anxiety) while performing your inspection. And then we give it back to you. 

You get a report.

But that's not all. We want to make sure you have basic understanding of what's going on, ...of how it all works together. We want you to understand the both the report and the dwelling's innerworkings.

Real estate is serious business. The money is big no matter who you are. There are pressures from all sides—sellers, agents, lawyers, lenders, family. People's livelihood and in some cases their lives may depend on real estate transactions.

With CBI you'll have all the support needed to understand the current condition of the dwelling, and how to make a better. We will walk step-by-step through the report with you. We expect questions. We encourage questions.  Even if they come up 6 months, a year, 10 years down the road or whatever and you don't know who to call, call us. CBI is here to help you.

Thank you for reading.

Ken

Ken Whitelaw,

ken@inspectingchicago.com

CBI, Inc.

Office: 312INSPECT

www.inspectingchicago.com