2024 Election

Today the majority of American voters apparently chose a lying, cheating, bullying, pandering narcissistic sexual predator as their leader. Those of us who voted for the other realize that our fundamental rights as Americans, as human beings, will now be for sale to the highest bidder. We'll all see how this unfolds. I pray my worst fears go unrealized.

Oh Waiter!

Today I'm feeding my cat and I have a little less than half a can of one cat food flavor, let's call it 'Fisherman's Special'. It's not enough food for his dinner, so I open up another can, let's call this one 'Beefy Dinner with Gravy', mix it in with the other, set the bowl down and he goes to town. 

I start wondering as Gil is nom-nomming away if this pisses him off. Like, "What the hell, Ken? You mixed Fisherman's Special and Beefy Dinner with Gravy? That's fucked up and I'm not paying for this." 

He doesn't stop eating but now with every bite he's plotting his revenge.

Do Carpenter Bees Throw Shade at Cicadas Because They Can't Fly for Shit?

Next to my driveway is a utility pole that has for years housed a carpenter bee condominium. Though we know one another, we've not yet learned to communicate. 

We're working on it.

And they fascinate me. I stand there staring at them. I do this a lot.

This afternoon I'm standing there staring as a cicada rambles into view. Compared to the bees, it's the insect aeronautical equivalent of a big dumb dog. It almost collides with one of the bees, saved only by the bee's maneuverability.

 I hear this conversation.

Joe: "WTF was that‽ Stan, you saw it? It just flew right through my flight path, if you call that flying. Jeez!"

Stan: "Cicadas, Joe, they're called cicadas. How do you not know this? ...been asleep for two weeks? Are you deaf?"

Joe: "Huh?"

Stan: "The Noise?"

Joe: "...damn near took my head off. Oh! That's them?"

Stan: "Yeah. They've been underground for like 17 years. They started coming out last week. ...billions of them. For 4 weeks all they do is drink, fuck, and lay eggs."

Joe: "No shit?"

Stan: "I shit you not. Joe, how do you not know this? It's been in the news for 6 months."

Joe: "That's kinda why I'm here. I stopped getting the paper.  ...went off the grid about a year ago. ...pot farm in the western suburbs. I'm tired of that shit."

Joe divebombs to the bottom of the pole, Stan follows suit.

Joe: "They're kinda cool, like prehistoric, or alien."

Stan,:  "Yeah. But you're right. They can't fly for shit."

A Day in the Life

They call me Agent K (no they don't). I'm a licensed home inspector and this is today's story.

Long Story Short

Today it's dreary, gray, about 31°F. Yesterday, a decent amount of heavy, wet snow fell.

A little while ago (it's noon here), I performed a moisture intrusion inspection that turned out to be less about moisture intrusion and more about attic condensation, the likes of which I've never seen.

Short Story Long 

Entering the ranch style home, I'm taken to the kitchen where I'm shown black water dripping from the the head of a sliding door separating a new addition and the old house. The new addition has a cathedral ceiling and houses a lap pool.

Buckets, pails and at least one trash can are almost filled with the stuff. I do an infrared scan of the interior, seeing cold spots at can lights and wall/ceiling intersections. I take RH and temp levels; both are elevated. I set up and climb my ladder to the attic.

In there it's literally raining. Every time I bump a rafter, drops of water fall like when shaking a tree limb after a summer rain.

There's a standalone dehumidifier that's not working because the genius who set it up ran the gravity drain hose uphill. An industrial blower fan pushes around air so water-laden I can see it. The space is dark, dank and cave-like. 66° and 54% RH. Shining my headlamp around I spot an active plumbing stack termination, a couple flat-roof breathers and uninsulated ductwork. 

Puddles are everywhere. Mold is everywhere. Little rivulets of water stream down the old roof toward what was once the house's north exterior wall.

All this is tucked away between an old, shingle/flat roof combo and a new pitched roof extension. ...an attic over an attic, as it were.

Attic ventilation consists of intermittent soffit vents and a ridge vent that's more sponge than vent. In the addition there are two bathroom-style vent fans with exterior termination. 

I've a good idea what I'll report and, keelhauling a GC aside, what I'll recommend. 

I just wanted to share.

Thanks for reading.

Agent K